Jens Vorkefeld
Creative Writing
Workshop 4
I love the rockband „O2“. Since I was a young child I always enjoyed their music. No night went by that I didn’t listen to their music right before I went to bed. I think I wouldn’t even have been able to sleep without listening to their music. Now is my chance to see them live…not once, not twice, not three or four times, NO, 6 times!
I can`t believe I my mom`s new husband got me tickets for O2`s Europe tour. Paris, Rom, London, Berlin, Madrid and Prague. Omg, I am so excited.
I hope my dad doesn’t make any trouble. He used to be a policeman and therefore is always very suspicious concerning those things. He loves me, so I am sure he wont say anything. He can`t! He knows I always loved O2, so why would he forbid me to go?!
Yes, I got my dad`s permission. He wasn’t happy with the idea of following a rockband through Europe but he finally gave in. I just needed to promise him to call twice a day and to call him when we landed in Paris and when we got to our Hotel.
I love my daughter but she is so careless. She doesn’t know how dangerous the world can be and now she is going to Europe. Why did I give my permission? This is suicide, so many things could happen to her.
…
Why is she not calling? I checked her flight online and it clearly said that the plane already landed hours ago. I told her to call me immediately after they landed.
Omg, did the Hotel guy really just tell me that she hasn`t checked in yet?! The Hotel is right next to the airport, she must already be there. Why hasn`t she called yet? Maybe her phone is broken but no, she just got it a week ago as a birthday present. It can`t be broken that fast. Something must have happened to her. I knew it, how could I be so blind and think nothing would happen to her. I should know better!
My beautiful daughter, what happened to you? I will find you, I promise. Whoever did this to you can`t hide from me. I will find and kill you for what you did to my daughter. I need a plane, right now. Time is running out…
This piece reminds me of the Taken movie. I think the dad is a psycho for letting his daughter to stalk a band around Europe. The father immediately realizes his mistake shortly after his daughter leaves (as he should). I like how you have the story from two different viewpoints: first, the daughter’s and then the father’s. In my opinion, the father overreacts to the situation. He adds too much worry and suspense to the situation; the father overreacts to the disappearance of his daughter (the main character) and automatically assumes that the worst has happened to her. He jumps to ridiculous conclusions that his daughter was either kidnapped or raped. Overall, this short piece paints a perfect picture of an innocent daughter that wants to follow her favorite boy band and a crazy-ass, over reactive father who takes measures to the extreme and needs to take a chill pill.
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